Hurt my feelings? no... sorry. I'm also going bald, there's another one for you to find some good jabs for. I'm slowing developing a little gut also?
but if you're into baking...girly boy...i'd prefer oatmeal butterscotch. bring em to the beach and in between launching my kite and digging through the sand for some loose change for me you can pass them out to everyone.
hurt my self esteem? get married, have a kid, move to another state and change jobs at least 3 times, buy a house, pay bills, support your whole family. after all that you have earned the right to enjoy my glowing self esteem.
(kids

)